It seems there's never enough hours in the day… for what needs doing (including my commitment to writing this blog and other writing that makes me feel alive) and for all the commitments that ripple out with a family of five.
I often wake up with anxiety from instant messages in my brain… to do lists forming before my eyes fully open, and the accompanying thought that there just isn't enough time to do what I think I need to do that day, morning, hour etc. It's a crappy way to wake up!
So, the last thing I felt like doing this morning was to take the few minutes it took to do something for my neighbour (doesn't matter what, that's not the point). But, I was compelled to take the time and do it, and as I did, I prayed that it be a 'sacrifice of praise' to God. Sounds like odd words maybe, but I simply meant that my actions were in a direct response of obedience to what I feel God asks me to do… think beyond my immediate circle of influence and do something completely selfless once in a awhile. I blow this all the time, but on this particular morning, I didn't.
There I was, doing my thing and praying over and over in my head… "sacrifice of praise God, sacrifice of praise." Nobody saw me (except my husband) do what I did… again, not the point of what I was doing.
Then on I went with what I needed to do, which still seemed like a lot.
An hour later the phone rings… it's my son's youth leader phoning with the details for my son's 'sit-in' this weekend, which involves some prep for me too. He started the conversation with the words, "So, about tomorrow night…," and I said, 'Tomorrow night, I thought it was tonight?" and suddenly grace stepped in and flooded over me. I was given, undeservedly, without cost, without asking, the gracious gift of time!!!!!!
So, I'm left with a question… as much for myself as for you…
Do I believe? Could there possibly be a connection between that one tiny selfless act of neighbourliness this morning and the gift of time that I was given a short while later?
Any providence in those events?
Any room in my heart to believe that?
I want to believe.
2 months ago